‘A dad is a son’s first hero and a girl’s first love,’ every time I read these words, I admire fathers some more, and especially single fathers. For fathers are not just providers, but pillars of support, examples of inspiration and an unending source of fun and frolic. And when it comes to single fathers, I think they mean everything for their children. Whenever a conversation comes up regarding a single parent, we tend to picture a mother, but of late, there has been a considerable increase in the number of fathers, who are braving the difficulties of raising up children alone.
Be it a single father or a mother, the journey they undertake is not easy. But, on the brighter side, such parents are much stronger as well as resilient and their children, more adjusting, cooperative and responsible.
This article deals with some helpful advice to make the journey of single fathers easier:
1. Do not shy away from taking help
“Men don’t ask for help,” I hear it over and over again. Be it as simple as asking for directions on the road or taking more important decisions of life, ‘men’ and ‘taking help’ are a bunch of words that rarely meet. But, let me tell you, help is the most important and rewarding thing you will need while raising your children. In fact, you will find that it does good for your children to meet and spend time with more people. You can take the help of your relatives like your mother or sister or call up a friend. For your child’s safety, always have the numbers of a few people who can reach you at a moment’s notice.
2. Make a routine to create a sense of safety
Children draw strength from their parents, especially in times when only one of them is available. At such a time, routine helps children to adjust well. As a parent, following a routine lets you take control of the time available. Being in control means knowing what happens when. This makes a child adjust to daily activities and remain more peaceful through physical as well as emotional changes.
Make sure that your children go to bed and wake up at the same time every day. Similarly, parents who regularly eat, play and communicate with their children, create a safety net for them. On the contrary, children of a parent who is unavailable and does not communicate well, are emotionally unstable and find it hard to have healthy attachments in future.
Taking care of a child, especially a young one, single-handedly leaves a parent exhausted. And the last thing you are expecting is some free time for yourself. I know it seems impossible to even take a break, leave taking a day off. But just think, can’t you ask one of your parents to take care of your kid for a day? Or could it not be possible to send your kid for a sleepover to her friend’s house? It can be arranged. Right? You don’t have to be so hard on yourself. Spend some time with your friends or go to the gym. Do anything which makes you feel energized and refreshed.
P.S: Don’t use this time to finish chores, however tempting it may seem.
The path to single parenthood is paved with difficulties and every day seems yet another battle to win. But, on the other hand, when you see your child growing up to become a responsible young boy/girl, the credit will go to you. Just you. Someday in the future, you both will sit down and look at these very days and smile. The journey was difficult, but totally worth it.
Are you a single parent who finds every day a challenge? Share with us your story and experience. Its time you spoke up!